5 ways to talk to kids who avoid our requests.
Hi Reader,
Are you worried your kids will never learn to be more responsible or contribute without complaining?
Congrats. You've joined millions of parents worldwide with the same thought! π
But seriously, you're not alone, and I have some thoughts to share in this video.
When we reflect on how we speak to our kids and examine the phrases we use to instruct them or ask for what we want - we might find the root of the problem AND solutions to many of our struggles.
Think about the language you use to direct and connect with your kids.
- Is it harsh, sharp, hurried, or hesitant?
- Or is it sensitive, inviting, deliberate, and clear?
Do you ever think about how your kids are hearing your requests? It's not uncommon to be unconsciously short with our kids (and expecting compliance) when we're busy or focused on important tasks,
We might not even realize it until their behavior sends us a wake-up call. And then it's time to check ourselves.
Is our body language open and approachable?
Are our facial expressions soft and curious?
We can either draw our kids closer to us or push them away in fear, depending on how we speak and behave toward them.
By noticing how we talk to our children, cooperation (previously obscured by messy emotional manipulation, fear, or punitive control) - becomes possible.
Consider these questions:
- Do the words you use invite connection or disconnection?
- What is the emotional tone of your verbal and nonverbal language?
Here is a short video where I share 5 ways to help kids who avoid helping around the house (or cleaning up after themselves!)
β¨How to Talk to Kids Who Avoid Our Requestsβ¨
β
TL;DW (here are the highlights)
- Communication: Use a neutral tone.
- Compassion: Donβt demand. Share your needs and seek compassion instead of compliance.
- Investigate: Know how your kids like to be approached.
- Accommodate: Remove stress. Take things off their plate.
- Timing: Know when your kids are most receptive to (aka most regulated).
This short clip obviously canβt give the whole picture (join my community to watch the full video), and thereβs so much more to say here. But please know that how we βTALKβ has SO much influence over how our kids respond.
β‘οΈ Tone
β‘οΈ Attitude
β‘οΈ Languageβ
β‘οΈ Kindness
βWatch it here.β
Thank you so much for being here, reading, and watching! Until next time, please remember it's about being conscious - not perfect. Talk soon!
Warmly,
β
Freebies for You:β
βChaos to Cooperationβ
βConscious Parenting Academyβ
Communication Cards
βAll Kidsβ
βLittle Kidsβ
βTeensβ
βEducatorsβ
Conscious Parenting Classes
βHost Your Own Parenting Classesβ
βParenting Class Libraryββ
βMember Circle ($9/mo - 1st month free)β