Something has been happening at my home recently (and repeatedly), and I'd like to get to the bottom of it.

Hi Reader,

But first, a quick reminder: Our Start of Summer Course Sale is closing this weekend, and I don't want you to miss it. ☀️⛱

If you're like many parents, knowing what to say and when to say can be tricky. Words fail us because we're stressed out and looking for solutions before we've made a connection.

When we're focused on getting things done, fearing the worst, or gaining compliance - we're less likely to approach our kids with curiosity and compassion.

Communication can be more challenging than the actual conflict sometimes. But you're here with me - so you have options.

And speaking of communication, something's been happening at my home, and I'm trying to understand it. Multiple postcards and letters have recently been left in our mailbox - more and more every day.

This correspondence is all addressed to my 17-year-old daughter. These solicitations have become so frequent that I'm getting concerned.

I asked her about it, and she was shocked at my concern and confusion. She shook her head and laughed, "Mom, it's ok. I'm going to be a senior."

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

You guys, I CANNOT stop the college mail. They just keep sending it, reinforcing the fact that childhood is so freaking short!

I can't wrap my head around the fact that we're not still arguing about wrongly-cut bananas and that time when she was five and wanted to wear the thrift-store-sequined-women's-ball-gown over her clothes to the theater (she did and looked fabulous).

I can't fathom how 17 years have gone by already. But I'm so glad I stuck to my gut and learned to break the cycle of name-calling, judgment, and guilt in my family.

It goes SO fast. (if you're sitting there surrounded by little ones who won't stop touching you, feel free to tell me to F-off me because I know it's SO hard right now.)

I just wanted to say that I started teaching online when my daughter was born, and in a year, I'll be celebrating her graduation from high school.

Someone PLEASE tell me how it happened so fast.

Time does not wait for us to catch up or figure it out. No one is waiting for us to learn to be less controlling or more compassionate. One day, we blink and hope we did the best we could.

There are so many things that I didn't get right. But the one thing I know (and it wasn't always easy) is that relationship + regulation + boundaries = REAL discipline.

It's not about the punishments. It's not about the consequences. It's about the relationship. First, last, always.

Don't miss your chance to set limits with compassion. Get all the details on my Conscious Communication course here! (And save 50% this weekend).

As always, until next time, please remember it's about being conscious - not perfect! Talk soon.

Warmly,

"An absolutely amazing resource."

Lori is really great at giving you very clear direction about what to do in your situation. Have no fear! Her knowledge of children’s developmental stages and the information she has combined with a generous heart make her an absolutely amazing resource. - Jennifer Fitch, Mom of 2

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