🤔 Find the fine line between being helpful but not too lenient.
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Reader - If you're anything like me - you reeeeaaally want to be calm and nonjudgmental in your communication. But, like many things, it's a work in progress (sometimes more work than progress 😬). We have this big "super goal" of using conscious communication to resolve conflict peacefully - but how many of us are really feeling (somewhat) peaceful when we try? Being conscious and non-punitive doesn’t mean you absolve your children of accountability or responsibility. But how do we find that fine line between being helpful but not too lenient? It starts with slight shifts in perspective. Like when you say,
“I know you’re excited about the park. We can leave when (chores/homework) are finished. What do you need to help you get started?” That is non-punitive, helpful, and direct. Very different than saying,
“If you don’t do (chores/homework), we’re not going to the park. Your choice. Make it wisely!” There's a hostile wall we put up when we challenge our kids to self-correct instead of inspiring them to make good choices. The first is said in the spirit of guiding the child and assisting with the intention to help. The latter has an air of judgment, and kids will feel it as controlling rather than helpful or supportive. Building this trust is crucial to influencing our kids - but if you're having a hard time seeing your kids with the best of intentions - you definitely won't regret joining us Feb 3-12 for this LIVE week together. Don't want to hear about Chaos to Cooperation Live 2025? Click here to stop notifications.
Don't risk your relationship OR your child's emotional health for short-term compliance.With kids - it's much easier to change sooner rather than later! And it's never too early to get out your frustrations with a listening ear (mine) to make some quick, impactful changes (and see your family in a brand new way)! All you need to access our daily video, chats, and Q&As in our Private What's App Group – is the Workbook. Download it → here. *Live Video Chat Dates Do more for yourself this year (this 10-day retreat is the best $23 you’ll spend this year). More patience = more compassion to give to others (and yourself). When we are triggered emotionally, a set of impulses arises in us, unconsciously translating our feelings into thoughts, words, and behaviors. According to psychologist Paul Ekman, PhD, once we start behaving from an emotional standpoint, we are not only not connected consciously to our behavior, but we also lose the ability to RECONSIDER things. In those moments, we cannot see anything except what matches our current feelings. We can’t tap into our “knowledge” of what to say in those moments. Our words are lost to our stress response. It’s hard to see things clearly or from a different perspective. And our kids feel the same way, sometimes. But this doesn’t have to be a cycle on repeat! Building emotional awareness and accessing your coping tools is possible. Let’s talk about what it takes to maintain our perspective and our ability to remain tolerant and helpful. I'd love to have you join us. Grab Your Workbook Download Here (only $23 until Jan 30th)! And please, please remember, it's about being conscious - not perfect! Warmly, Our 10-Day Live Chat Schedule All you need to join is a copy of this digital guide. Freebies & Archives Raise Respectful Kids Don't want to hear about Chaos to Cooperation Live 2025? Click here to stop notifications. |
