Teach Through Love

Reader - I recently came across a social media post from someone whose child was gushing with gratitude towards her. The post essentially said, "Here's what happens when you parent peacefully." 👀 At first, I thought, "Well, that's lovely." But then, I also thought, "My daughter would NEVER do that." It's not that I don't have a great relationship with my kid. I do. Maybe it's not in her personality to express herself like that, but even if it was, I'm not sure I'd get that kind of glowing...

Reader... It's about time we take care of YOU! I'm sure you receive lots of advice on helping your kids "do what they need to do." But who's helping you BE the kind of parent your kids need - by addressing your needs? We often put all the focus on changing our kids - being kinder, firmer, more affectionate - whatever it is - we seemed to be focused on "doing" all the "right" things. And all the suggestions out there seem to be child-centered, even though taking care of ourselves is a core...

"I feel like I'm acting. The words don't feel natural." Have you ever thought that when trying to be more compassionate with your kids - Reader? I mean, it IS a lot easier to say, "Just do what I ask!" 😬 Back when I was a young actor, we were taught a technique called "sense memory." It was this idea of using past experiences to elicit a "real" emotional response from our character's POV. I remember it wasn't always easy to recall specific events. Childhood trauma can significantly impact our...

Reader - What's the most challenging part of communicating with compassion? Does it feel awkward or stilted?Are you too angry to choose your words consciously?Maybe you're struggling to manage meltdowns without losing your patience. I've been reframing language on the internet and in our classes for over 13 years, and the one misstep most people make is focusing on the "right" words to say. Huh? 🤔 Lori, aren't you the "Conscious Communication Card" lady? Yes, but because I grew up with a lot...

Reader - This video is especially for anyone wondering why things aren't changing fast enough (👋🏻 parents of young kids). I realized that many people have this misconception about conscious parenting (or parenting in general). And it's causing a lot of unnecessary frustration and guilt. The real reason you haven't seen a change in your child's behavior yet probably isn't what you think. We tend to think of behavior as binary. ➡️ Good-Bad➡️ Right-Wrong. Maybe your idea of progress is — When I...

Reader? Why is it so hard to be compassionate with our kids, especially when their behaviors push every button we have? Is there some secret to staying cool when our patience is tested? If I could have had just ONE wish granted as a new mom, it would have been unlimited tolerance. 🤔 We know we don't have to be "perfect" parents, but when we're struggling to stay compassionate, what can we do to avoid escalating the tension? STAY COMPOSED & SET STRONG BOUNDARIES We've all been there, right?...

Reader! I was thinking about a question from a recent webinar. A parent asked how to help their child not feel rejected by peers who had excluded her. It got me thinking about how often we're getting in the way of letting our children process their feelings - especially when they need to go through something painful so they can grow. Why Distracting May Be Doing More Harm Than Good Knowing when it's okay to let kids "stress out" a bit and when we need to be a buffer for them can be confusing....

Reader - do you need support or ideas for staying regulated? As much as we try - when kids aren't responsive to our efforts to remain patient with them, it is HARD not to become angry and frustrated. Here's the good news. ☀️ Conscious parenting is about helping us become "conscious" of our words and actions - not perfect. We can become more self-aware and intentional without stopping our feelings or ignoring our pain. But often, helping our kids means we put our needs last. It might not be...

Reader, If you fall back on old reactive habits of control, please know it's totally normal. It's hard not to judge ourselves or blame our kids when this happens. 😔 🙌🏻 Choosing to let go of control and force is a brave step (and super complicated). Remember, you're not just building your child's skills but also expanding your own tolerance. That's not easy to do in a society that is conditioned to judge parenting and think punitively about child-rearing. Do you ever hear yourself saying...